• Как я бросала гранату

  • Амстердам готовится к ADE’ 10

  • Не могу, как же я прусь от этого юмора.
    Небольшая колонка редактора в Exile - 'Moscow-based only alternative English-language newspaper'. У них недавно 10-летие было, вот что они написали
    Люблю сюр )))

    It's now 10 years since we first founded Ze eKzail, Washington DC's only alternative Russian-language newspaper, and folks, what a wild decade it's been. When we first arrived in the mid-1990s, this town was a wasteland by most Russians' standards. Most of us had to live in bizarre single-family houses, which gave us way too much privacy. (Shit, you couldn't even hear a neighbor doing remont, pounding on your walls and sending dirt and dust into the corridor -- how can you live in a place where you don't hear your neighbors doing remont?!) The only really attractive dwellings in DC, the apartment blocks in Southeast, were already taken by the town's Negroes. But since none of the Russian expats wanted to live near Negroes, they were forced either to slum it by renting out those single-dwelling houses in places like Cleveland Heights, or else live in Russified hotels like the Intourist, which offered the kind of overdone baroque interiors, bad service, and lobby whores that colonialist Russians were used to.

    In other words, when Russians moved into Washington, they came looking for Russia. And when they didn't find it, they set out to change it in their image.

    Welp, it's 10 years later, ten years of Ze eKzail, and now all of our Russian expat readers are comfortably tucked away in Russo-remonted apartment block flats. There isn't a single Negro left in Washington DC, except for those who stand outside of the city's top Russian restaurants wearing colonial American costumes. The only "blacks" this town has are Tajiks imported to build the dacha settlements in Maryland and Virginia for the entrenched Russian expat executives.

    It's amazing to imagine it, but Southeast DC now boasts some of the most expensive real estate outside of Moscow, particularly the so-called "Golden Mile" of former housing projects now filled with super-rich Russian expats working for state companies, think tanks, and the FSB. The Negroes were moved out with promises to relocate them into newer dwellings in Baltimore in a program backed by the Commonwealth of Independent States Monetary Fund, but we haven't heard anything about them since. H'm, it's kind of weird, when you think about it.

    And what about the food? Whereas before all you could find in Washington were ethnic restaurants serving heavily spiced food at prices way too cheap to be considered quality, today Washington boasts at least a dozen places serving pelmeni, with dozens more to come. Sushi is at last served in cafes, just as it should be, in spite of Americans' idiotic prejudices for sushi that is "fresh." And last week, we even found a Chinese restaurant that finally "gets it," taking out all of the unpleasant spicy crap, replacing it with dill and mayonnaise, and charging at least four times the price of what the monkeys next door who still serve old-fashioned "spicy" Chinese charge. Service is also getting more Russified. Waiters who just a decade ago described wines using all sorts of intentionally confusing words such as "Shiraz" or "Pinot" or "oak-flavored with a hint of berry," finally understand that wines only come in two sorts: "sweet" or "dry."

    http://www.exile.ru/2007-April-06/the_ten_year_plan.html




  • Как я бросала гранату

  • Амстердам готовится к ADE’ 10